debunking meditation myths — so much more than calm

tl/dr: The primary obstacle you will face when starting to meditate is wanting to give up. Often rooted in common misconceptions about why we meditate and what "success" looks like.

Myth	Reality
Myth #1: Meditation thinking about nothing and struggling against thoughts.	We use details of the breath, a visualization, or contemplation to captivate attention, train focus, and generate real insights. Success = returning, to our object of focus and cushion.
Myth #2: We meditate to feel calm and relaxed.	Joy, compassion, purposefulness are vibrant states of being we habituate in the lineage I share.
Myth #3: Meditation means believing in something like a religion or God.	It's about reprogramming subconscious conditioning to shape reality and align with our highest potential.
Myth #4: Meditation is only about the mind.	Meditation will transform every corner of your life from career to relationship - with others and self.

Sitting with the mind untamed can be an uncomfortable, even confronting, experience.

You're not alone.

Having primarily taught meditation to beginners, believe me when I say, everyone faces the same challenges at the start.

Have you ever thought to yourself, 'that felt like forever', 'that was hard' or simply, 'wow, I did not enjoy that'?

So for the curious notice, here are helpful reframes for common meditation misconceptions:

Tip: no one is grading your performance nor how long you can go. Start smaller than you think you should - one minute consistently, is better than 10 minutes once. Be gentle. Release expectations and celebrate that you made the effort to sit. These will reinforce neural reward pathways to support returning to your practice again and again.

---

Myth # 1: Meditation is thinking about nothing

Meditation isn’t about struggling against thoughts. Your brain thinks and has thoughts, just as our tongues taste and ears hear.

Think of your awareness like a stream, always moving, so the mind needs something to lock onto.

To begin every practice, we use details of the breath and body as stabilize our mind and training our focus. This is preparation before introducing vibrant visualizations and insight-generating contemplations.

The more we practice, the easier it becomes to stay "single pointed" (samadhi in Sanskrit) in our concentration. We are "habituating" (gom in Tibetan) a desired state of being in our mind and heart*.

In Buddhist psychology, the heart and mind are intrinsically interwoven. The “citta” (heart-mind), pronounced chitta in Pali and Sanskrit, encapsulate all our thoughts, feelings, responses, intuition, temperament, and consciousness itself. (Littlefair et al., Research on link between heart, mind)

Myth # 2: Meditation is about blissing out

Relaxation and calm are inevitable byproducts of a meditative practice.

However beyond day-to-day mindfulness, meditation has the potential to foster lasting vibrant states of being:

Clarity and purposeful momentum toward our goals.

Joy and appreciation for the little things in life.

Myth # 3: Meditation means believing in something, like a religion or God

Meditation can be religious for some, but ultimately the only requirement is to have a mind.

Meditation is a tool to reprogram our subconscious, the filters through which we perceive the world.

Like a trade-in program, swapping out narrowing self-critical lenses (i.e. negativity bias) for a steadfast and rose-colored perspective of the world, others, and ourselves (hint: they are one in the same).

Myth # 4: Meditation is only about the mind

I'll offer my personal experience as evidence that meditation will not only transform your mind, but every corner of your world.

With dedication to the practice, every relationship in my life is brighter and richer, friendship to familial. Yes, even (especially) the tricky ones.

While experiencing profound upheaval, alongside the rest of the world, and change both personally and professionally, meditation has been an indispensable tool to foster clarity* and resilience.

*evolution is made possible not despite of, but rather because of, the unique nuances of life's inevitable challenges

“What man needs is not a tensionless state, but rather, the striving and struggling for some goal worthy... Life is not primarily a quest for pleasure, as Freud believed, or a quest for power, as Alfred Adler taught, but a quest for meaning." - Victor Frankl

Bonus myth: Personal development is a personal i.e. solo journey.

Learning to lean on others - to learn from teachers, coaches, support networks - is a powerful skill that extends beyond meditation.

Everything I know is because of generous and wise teachers along my journey, in combination with effort and evidence in applying their teachings.

Whatever you call these guides, they are integral mirrors of our inner world and champions of our evolution. 

---

Building a powerful meditative practice requires learning the tools {how}. But just as importantly, we need to get clear on our personal {why} and create systems of accountability {when}.

Let's chat 1:1 to understand your goals and see if a personalized meditation plan or coaching could be a good fit.

Love, Julia

Cited Sources:

Littlefair, S. (2017, June 15). Buddhist researchers seek to reveal link between heart, mind. Lions Roar. https://www.lionsroar.com/buddhist-researcher-heart-mind/

Rozin, P., & Royzman, E. B. (2001). Negativity Bias, Negativity Dominance, and Contagion. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 5(4), 296-320. https://doi.org/10.1207/S15327957PSPR0504_2